Why you should be realistic when dating
From a very young age we start thinking about our perfect partner and while they may evolve and tweak slightly as we grow and our tastes and personalities change, they very rarely stray too far from the original. But how realistic are you about dating and your proposed match?
While basing your ideal partner on a swoon-worthy actor or glamorous supermodel may help you visualise the type of person that you are looking for, realistically your perfect partner is likely to be miles apart from what you initially thought. Think about it, if you were to take your celebrity crush how many of your previous partners looked or even acted like that person? Probably, none.
When it comes to dating you need to be realistic. If youhave a long checklist of traits that a partner has to meet it is highlyunlikely that you will ever find the one that you are looking for – simplybecause they do not exist. At some point we need to compromise and really thinkabout the things that are important – the values, aspirations and lifestylethat are compatible to your own.
How many times have you ruled somebody out because they werea few inches shorter than your ideal or a few years older, even though the restof their profile sounded great? By fixating on that one element, you could beshutting out the perfect partner for you all for the sake of a number on a page.
As we get older things change and the traits and qualities that are most important to us take on a more pivotal role in our decision making. While you may still be attracting younger matches, you have to consider where that relationship will lead long-term. As the age-old saying goes, beauty fades but personality is forever, so when you are next considering a match think about the compatibility as well as the attraction because ultimately you need to ensure that there is more to your relationship than the physical aspects of a person such as looks, age or height.
This is where a matchmaker can really help. Working with amatchmaker can push your boundaries and help change your mindset on what youare looking for. Of course, you need to find your partner attractive and sharethe same dreams and goals for the future, but you also need to be realistic andopen-minded and not turn someone down simply because they don’t tick all theboxes on your checklist.
A matchmaker is able to help guide and support you throughthe journey and recommend potential introductions based on the characteristics thatreally matter. After all, how many times have you spoken to a friend who statedthat they only find men over 6ft attractive only to find that the man theysettle down with is only 5ft 9in. Or found yourself ruling somebody out becausethey are a few years outside your age range, only to find the perfect partnerwas a lot older but had the zest for life and get up and go that agesubsequently became insignificant.
By being realistic when dating as to what is most important to you, you will find that your relationships are built on stronger foundations with values and aspirations that truly complement yourself and your lifestyle – giving you the best chance of success for that ultimate goal of a long-term committed relationship.
At Ignite Dating, our matchmakers use a unique mix of Myers Briggs personality profiling, intuition and expertise to match you with potential partners that have the values, aspirations and goals that you are looking for. We will introduce you to like-minded individuals that we believe will complement your lifestyle and open your eyes as to the most important aspects of your ideal partner – even if they’re not your usual type. If you’ve been chasing the same type of person for years now with no success and would like to try a new approach with experts to guide you throughout, then get in touch with our team today and let us help you find the right person for you.
